Ever had one of those days where you think - wow, maybe that whole mom thing just doesn't really suit me?
Today, I'm there.
Today was Ellie Kate's 6th birthday party. We had a tea party with a few of her closest friends. Its also one of my husbands busiest weekends of his ministry. I was thinking ahead - for once - and actually hired someone to come and host the party. It is a traveling tea company and they are the sweetest most wonderful people ever. So, you'd think I would have had it together.
I spent most of my day running around, chasing wild children, reprimanding sibling disputes, disciplining disobedience, and saying "calm down" more than I care to admit or remember.
I put my children to bed 10 minutes ago, and now all I wanna do is run up to their bedrooms and apologize for their mommies behavior today.
It comforts me to speak in third person occasionally as if I'm talking about that girl in the 5th grade who threw a dodge ball at my head in gym class.
I mean, I know as a mom and wife we all have our off days, but I'm constantly left asking myself "why?"
I have been given the greatest gift and job on the planet, and so often, I find myself longing for the moments I spend without them and with just some peace and quiet.
Keepin it real, yall.
I think about Jesus unending love for us and it only further allows me to slightly catch a glimpse of what truly incredible God I know. How I long for an attitude of constant forgiveness and patience. How I pray for a day when I don't lost my cool and a day that my husband can walk through the door and be able to actually WALK through the door as opposed to tripping all over the piles of laundry. How I long for a day when I sit on the couch after sweetly tucking my children in to bed and think - job well done.
Lord, may you continue your good work in me. May my children see you, despite of me. Teach me to forgive. Teach me to have patience. Teach me to love like you.